Reading / Review Date: June 5, 2009
This book is about the extensive and disturbing research done by 2 authors that explain the ever increasing problem of cultural narcissism. I will say right here that there is some good research, but some information that we do not agree with in the book. This book’s subject caught our attention in light of what the bible says the world will be like just before Christ returns, that evil will increase. In 2 Timothy 3:1-4 it says: “But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather then lovers of God,”
The book covers many of the social affects selfishness has on relationships, business, the economy, family, child-rearing/development, and how this effects the society as a whole. The research in this area of the book was exceptional and went into much detailed accounts. One of the more interesting points was that technology is making ‘nar-Sin-ism’ flourish!
This book is psychology based, but we found the research interesting reading. Chapter 4 ‘How did we get here? Lays out the origins of the epidemic. The book even goes into the Banking/financial and mortgage crisis and how selfishness and greed played into the economical collapse. They show how entitlement is the key culprit, and that with each generation ‘self-admiration’ has increased to dangerous levels. From a Christian perspective section 4 - prognosis/treatment, would NOT be recommended reading.
Narcissism is described as feeling superior to others and entitled, lacking a deep-connection to others, using people for your own ends, bragging, cheating, and manipulative with little concern for others, and is ‘Self-Worship’, at the very least it is an inflated view of the Self. There is also a section in the book that discusses parenting and when parents treat their children as ‘princesses’ and princes’ how this contributes to an inflated view of Self and spoils the child and as they grow older will cause them to have an attitude of entitlement.
Although the authors write that narcissism is a disease, the Bible calls it - selfishness or self-centeredness, which is not a disease at all, but is a Sin. It is a condition of our fallen nature, and is why we need a Savior. They point out the difference between self-confidence and narcissism and say; “There is a difference between narcissism and self-confidence, feeling ‘special is Narcissism - not self-esteem, not self-confidence and not something we should be building into our children.” Feeling special is unlikely to lead to ’respect for others’, and of course, they don’t have to obey the rules.
On pg. 76 they say; “When children are overindulged, it leads to outcomes resembling the ’seven deadly sins’: Pride, wrath, envy, sloth, gluttony, lust, and greed.” On this point, they refer back to psychology for a diagnosis, but the Bible has various passages throughout that lists these as ’sins of the flesh’ Galatians 5:19-21, and in verse 22, tells believers to put on the fruit of the Spirit.
The book does touch on the subject of Religion, and they do recognize it’s benefits to combating the narcissism epidemic and agree that they teach a moral ethic and ’selfless’ life. The Authors do mention Joel Olsteen and his misguided teachings on ’loving yourself’ as an example of NOT producing what it claims to do.
Copyright © 2009
Publisher : Free Press
ISBN 13-978-1-4165-7598-6